5 Crazy Theories About Satoshi Nakamoto

Satoshi Nakamoto, the creator of bitcoin, has to be one of the most interesting and most studied characters of the 2010’s. And much like the Zodiac Killer, he never “got caught”, but has managed to keep his identity hidden like a true anonymity ninja. We don’t even know whether he is one person, or a group. Here are some of the craziest theories about the true identity of Satoshi Nakamoto.

1. Satoshi Nakamoto is a time traveler

This has got to be one of my favorite ideas about Satoshi. A poster on claims that Satoshi Nakamoto simply has to be a time traveler, because you know, otherwise the whole bitcoin thing just doesn’t make any sense. I recommend reading the whole thread, it is very entertaining.

2. Satoshi Nakamoto is the CIA

Another popular theory is that bitcoin was actually created by the CIA. After the whole NSA fiasco and Snowden’s revelations, this doesn’t sound too out-there. However, at the moment there is nothing to suggest that this is actually true, other than the fact that “Satoshi Nakamoto” translates to “Central Intelligence” in Japanese. Which doesn’t make much sense, if the CIA/NSA really created bitcoin, why give out such an obvious clue? Might as well have named it HoneypotCoin.

3. Satoshi Nakamoto is dead

Some people have speculated that Satoshi Nakamoto died shortly after leaving bitcoin development in 2010, perhaps due to murder. Other theories involve him being killed in the 2011 earthquake in Japan, or even of a terminal disease like cancer.

While it is true that Satoshi’s forum persona has made some posts in 2013, it was also revealed that his email was recently hacked, so it cannot be concluded that it was really him who made those forum posts in the first place.

4. Satoshi Nakamoto is the Illuminati

Or the …jews, who obviously control the world. And much like the CIA, they created bitcoin to secretly keep track of your money. Don’t ask me how I know.

5. Satoshi Nakamoto is your mom

[citation needed]

About Anarchyman

I roam the interwebz, corrupting people, but in a fun way